For Church Puppet Scripts. Email me.
posted by Marvin at 8:32 AM
0 comments
Thursday, July 05, 2007
Monday, July 17, 2006
Sample Funny Puppet Scripts for Churches, by Marvin Lansverk
Season of Easter. Please Hold for Your Confirmation Number.2 Timothy 1:1-7: Early supporters of the new new church. Joining the church. Confirmation. By Marvin Lansverk.
Puppets: Barnabas, Olivia, and Fodder
People: Confirmation Kids: Allison, Trevor, Laura, Kyle, Jesse; and Kids
Props: Astrolabe (made from three rulers rubber banded together) and Bell
[Fodder, Olivia, and Barnabas are up front, Fodder on one end. Sitting in front facing the congregation are the five confirmation kids]
Barnabas: Buenos dias boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Olivia: Hi kids. It’s good to see you all here, on Confirmation Sunday.
Fodder: Confirmation Sunday?
Barnabas: [With astrolabe] Yup. I can definitely confirm—based on the position of the sun and stars—that this is Sunday, May 21st, to be exact. [Toss astrolabe aside]
Fodder: Oh. In that case: Gooood morning Methodist’s. Whaaat’s happenin?
Olivia: We just told you what’s happening. It’s Confirmation Sunday—the day when we celebrate our youth joining the church as new members—after taking Confirmation classes this spring.
Fodder: Ah. But how are we to confirm that they really are confirmable? Shouldn’t we have them…give a demonstration?
Barnabas: A demonstration?
Olivia: Good idea. I know, let’s have them demonstrate their biblical and theological knowledge by putting it to the test—in head to head competition.
Fodder: With each other?
Olivia: With you. [Plop down bell] Please ring in if you know the answer.
Barnabas: First question. Name the first four… [Fodder rings in]
Fodder: Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John!
Barnabas: Very nice. But wrong. Confirmation team? Name the first four… [ring in. Team confers in whispers.]
Allison: “The oracle that the.”
Barnabas: Correct. Confirmation team 1, Fodder team 0.
Fodder: “The oracle that the?” What kind of an answer is that?
Barnabas: It’s the answer to this question: “Name the first four words of the book of Habbukuk.”
Olivia: OK. Next question. [Confirmation team rings in]
Trevor: One thousand, four hundred and four!
Olivia: Correct. Confirmation Team 2, Non Confirmation Team 0.
Fodder: Wait a minute. What was the question?
Olivia: Oh. Sorry. It was: “How many times does the word, “O,” appear in the Bible…as in “’O Lord God, what wilt thou give me?’” And 1,404 is correct.
Barnabas: Next question. [Confirmation Team rings in. Team confers in whispers]
Laura: Yes. The answer is “yes.”
Fodder: But…
Barnabas: [Leaning toward kids] Correct. The answer is “yes” [leaning towards Fodder] not “but.” And it’s a three-part question: “is it true that Jews don't recognize Jesus as the Messiah. That Protestants don't recognize the Pope as head of the church…And that Methodists don't recognize each other in the liquor store?” Let’s see. That gives the Confirmation Team 3, and the “Yet-to-Answer-a Question-Correctly Team” zero.
Fodder: Team? How can you call me a team, when there’s only one of me?...This isn’t fair.
Olivia: But you have a graduate degree in divinity. [Slowly] While for advanced theological study they have only just started to have a degree of affinity.
Barnabas: Next question: And just to be polite, maybe this time, you can all wait for the question to actually be read first, instead of relying on E.S.P.
Fodder: E.S.P.? Is that what they’re using?
Olivia: Educated strategic predictions.
Fodder: Oh.
Trevor: [Ringing in] One thousand, four hundred and four!
Fodder: You’re not getting points for that again! You already did that one.
Olivia: Ah. And the next one is a definition question: Please define biblical liter…[Fodder rings in]
Fodder: Biblical litter. What the Methodist men picked up by the side of the road last weekend!
Olivia: Sorry.
Kyle: [Team confers first] Biblical literacy! The condition or quality of being knowledgeable in matters having to do with the Bible and or Christianity. As in…what our team seems to possess—in abundance, thanks to Confirmation.
Olivia: Correct. Well done. Let’s see. That gives our Confirmation Team…
Fodder: All right, all right already. We know the score. This is beginning to feel like one of our softball games.
Barnabas: Anyway. We’re almost done. And to make it more interesting let’s make this one worth five points. Please name…[Fodder rings in, smugly]
Fodder: Eunice, Steve, Judy…and Howard.
Barnabas: Sorry. Those are characters in the Ryan O Neil-Barbra Streisand movie, What’s Up Doc? How about you guys?
Allison: Let’s see. Eunice is right. But then it's Steven. And Judith. But no Howard. Unless you count “Howard be thy name,” the way some kids say the Lord’s Prayer, when they’re little.”
Barnabas: Right! And the question was: "Name one man and two women in the Bible, one of whom is named in today’s Bible story." Which happens to be Eunice.
Fodder: Eunice? There’s a person in the Bible named Eunice?
Barnabas: Sure. She was Lois's mother, and Timothy's grandmother. Their whole extended family joined the church, just as these kids are today, working to spread the good news.
Olivia: And for our last—winner-takes-all question—hmmm..I got it, "do any of you know that great eighteenth century musical composition that celebrates God’s beautiful creation: Vivaldi’s Four Season.. [Confirmation team rings in. Confer.]
Jesse: Yes. [Grab violin and play a few runs!]
Barnabas: And to think that before Confirmation, he didn’t even know how to play a kazoo!
Olivia: Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls. I have the pleasure to introduce to you, the winners of our little Confirmation demonstration, our youth, who are winners by almost any definition you can think of. Because they are loved by God, and they know it. And so do we. Let’s give them all a hand.
All: Now, is this a great day or what?
A Night at the Opera
Season of Lent and Easter, Acts 4:32-37, 9:26-28, 11:19-30: Barnabas and Paul. Encouragement. Mother's Day.
Puppets: Barnabas, Olivia, and Fodder
People: Piano player and Kids
Songs: Brief themes from various operas: Mozart, Puccini, and then Bizet's Carmen:
[Barnabas, Olivia, and Fodder are up front, Fodder on one end.]
Barnabas: Buenos dias boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Olivia: Hi kids. It’s good to see you all here this morning.
Fodder: Gooood morrrrning Methodists! Whaaat’s happenin?
Barnabas: What’s happenin? I’ll tell you what’s happenin. I wrote an opera last night.
Olivia: Last night?
Barnabas: Well, actually it was more like this morning. I got inspired by seeing the one in town this weekend. And I thought if someone could write a four hour opera about…. that… then I certainly should be able to write one about today’s Bible story.
Fodder: What do you mean? What was the opera about?
Barnabas: [Slight pause] I have no idea. [Pause] I couldn’t see the subtitles from where I was sitting—way in the back. But it was mostly about a guy singing “I love you, I love you,” and a girl singing “I love you too, ummm, maybe I don’t, well, yes I do, but I don’t feel so well all of a sudden, but maybe if you sing really loudly into my ear I’ll feel better, unless I...” [pantomime her dying]. You know, that kind of opera stuff.
Fodder: Cool. So what’s your opera about?
Barnabas: Like I said. About today’s Bible story.
Olivia: But which story is it?
Barnabas: Hmm, funny you should ask. It happens to be the New Testament story today,
about Paul’s friend, one of the more important early apostles, who helped start some of the earliest churches, whose name means “the Encourager.”
Fodder: But your name means “the Encourager.”
Barnabas: You’re right! Well, how about that. Today’s story is about Barnabas.
Fodder: You wrote an opera about yourself?
Barnabas: Well, they always say to write about what you know. Besides, it’s not really about me! It’s about the Bible Barnabas. The one I was named after. About Barnabas the Encourager! You remember the story, don’t you?
Olivia: Of course I do. How could I forget—Mom must have told it to us a hundred times: Once there was a man from Cyprus, named Joseph.
Fodder: Joseph?
Olivia: Joseph. And soon after Easter, he heard about Jesus, and he believed. And he wanted to help. So he sold all he had and became an apostle. And from then on, he was called Barnabas--the Encourager.
Barnabas: And I encourage you to hurry up and finish telling this, so we can start my opera!
Olivia: Right. So Barnabas was the one who met Paul right after Paul's road to Damascus experience, when the risen Jesus appeared to Paul. It was Barnabas who first befriended Paul, who then introduced him to Jesus’ other disciples, convincing them that Paul was now on their side.
Barnabas: And he spent a lot of time with Paul starting a new church in Antioch, where the followers of Jesus were first called "Christians." Barnabas was a great encourager, which is why he was renamed “Barnabas” when he became a Christian.
Fodder: [Slightly irritated] OK, Ok. So we know that Barnabas is in the Bible [aside] (and that Fodder isn’t—except as camel food). And we know that Barnabas was friends with Paul [aside] (and that Fodder wasn't, though presumably Paul's donkey was fond of donkey fodder). And we know that now you’ve written an opera about it all—(all except the donkey fodder, I'm sure). So let’s hear it. How does this Barnabastic opera of yours go?
Barnabas: Well, I didn’t have time to compose the music yet. Just the words. So until I have time to do the music, we’ll just have to make do with second hand.
Olivia: Second hand lines? [Everybody gives a weird look]
Barnabas: Not second hand lines. Second hand music!
Piano Player: OK then. How about a little Mozart? [Play a line or two, Barnabas shakes head] Puccini? [Play a line or two, Barnabas shakes head] Bizet? [Play something from Carmen]
Barnabas: That’s it!
Fodder: Sheesh! If I’d written an opera last night, I would have taken the time to write the music, as well. When it comes to music, I am a true sophisticate. No one I know has a better appreciation for music.
Barnabas and Olivia: Shh! [Piano starts, march theme from Carmen]
Barnabas: [Singing, mangling the song to fit this rhythm, which it doesn't really]Barnabas and Olivia from Bolivia, Barnabas and Olivia from Bolivia That's in South America, what have you got to say? What have you got to say?Barnabas and Olivia from BoliviaTell us a story today.
Olivia: That song sounds strangely familiar.
Fodder: [Scoffing] That’s because it’s just the words of our regular theme song, sung to a different tune!
Barnabas: Well what if it is? I was just getting warmed up. And I encourage you to keep quiet during this next aria, so as not to disturb its beautiful virtuosity. [Piano starts theme from Carmen]
Olivia: [Singing] Ha ha ha ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, (etc).
Fodder: Second hand lines? It sounds more like second hand syllables. How long did it take you to come up with that one?
Barnabas: Shh. Olivia was supposed to be sounding happy. And she did. But please be quiet. The dramatic part is about to start. [Piano starts chromatic intro riff from Phantom of the Opera]
Barnabas and Olivia: [Singing, version of "The Phantom of the Opera is there, inside your mind"]Olivia and Barnabas are there, inside your church.Olivia and Barnabas won’t leave you in the lurch.
Fodder: [Sarcastically] Now that is inspiring. But what does any of this have to do with mothers, huh? It is Mother’s Day you know. [Or some other nearby holiday, as needed] Did Your Operaticusness [ah-per-AT-i-kiss-ness] remember that?
Barnabas and Olivia: [Replay chromatic Phantom piano riff as intro, then Barnabas and Olivia break into march from Carmen again instead, with piano accompaniment]Happy happy mother’s day, happy mother’s dayHappy happy mother’s day, happy mother’s dayHappy, hap hap hap happy mother’s dayHappy mother’s day. [Look at each other and shrug while piano finishes]
Olivia: Happy Barnabas Day! Happy Mother’s Day! [Look at Fodder] And what the heck, happy Fodder’s Day!
Barnabas: I encourage you all to get out and enjoy this beautiful day that the Lord has made.
All: Amen. Now, is this a great day or what?
Tuesday, May 09, 2006 Information About These Puppet Show Scripts
These puppet show scripts are performed each week at Bozeman United Methodist Church as part of the "chidren's time" portion of one of our worship services. They typically have two to three performers, from our team of puppeters. They are written each week by Marvin Lansverk, a professor of English at Montana State University, to supplement the Bible text that the Sunday School curriculum is focusing on that day. We don't rehearse these--or memorize them. Instead, they are emailed out in advance presented, reader's theater style. We use hand puppets and we do not use a puppet stage. Our performers are part of the performance.Puppet show scripts. Church puppets. Puppet shows for use in churches. Marvin Lansverk. Bozeman United Methodist Church. Puppet Scripts. Puppet Scripts for churches. Humorous. Funny. Hilarious. Christian puppet scripts. For any denomination. Methodist. Lutheran. Presbyterian. United Church of Christ. Congregational. Southern Baptist. American Baptist. Episcopalian. Evangelical Lutheran Church of America. ELCA.
Don't Stop Doing ThatBy: Marvin Lansverk
Church Year: Season of Lent and Easter
Title: Don't Stop Doing That
Bible Text: Luke 24:36-53, The Ascension
Theme: Jesus is with us
Puppets: Barnabas, Olivia, and Lippo
People: Kids
Props: Bible
[Tell kids to shout "HE IS RISEN INDEED," louder each time, at end]
[Lippo, Barnabas, and Olivia are up front, Barnabas in the middle]
Barnabas: Buenos dias kids. How is everybody today?
Olivia: Hi kids. It’s good to see you all here this morning. Hey look, it’s Lippo. It seems like we haven’t seen you since…before Brittney Spears was popular!
Lippo: Brittney Spears was popular?
Barnabas: [Feeling around] Hey, maybe we’re not actually seeing you now. Maybe we just hear you. [Pause] Wait….now I can’t even hear you. Shoot, maybe the whole thing was just my imagination.
[Lippo gives Barnabas a big smacking kiss]
Barnabas: Now I see you! It’s amazing what big pink smacking lips will do for your vison of reality. Lippo! We’ve missed you.
Lippo: And I’ve missed you. But I’ve been on one of those reality t.v. shows for a while—for the denomination.
Olivia: Really? What, like Methodist Survivor, or the Methodist Apprentice, or something? Cool, and instead of standing up and saying “you’re fired,” did the Bishop stand up and say: “You’re excommunicated!”
Lippo: No, no. Actually, I was just part of the ambiance on the set of American Idol. I was one of the fish swimming back and forth in the aquarium in the background.
Barnabas: But you said for the denomination.
Lippo: Yah. You know, for tens and twenties.
Olivia: Maybe we should be getting on with it. So just what is “it” today?
Barnabas: Oo. I just remembered something. I’ll be back in a minute. [Lippo and Olivia both look at each other and shrug]
Olivia: We’re supposed to be talking about the ascension.
Lippo: Ah. Whales and penguins do that.
Olivia: What?!?
Lippo: You know, they dive in the sea [make gesture], and eventually they come bursting out above the surface. [Make noise—pssshhh—and rising gesture]. Like that. Ascension.
Olivia: But, but…
Barnabas: [Sneak up behind them] Peace be with you!
Olivia and Lippo: Ahhhh!
Olivia: Would you stop doing that!?!
Barnabas: Doing what?
Lippo: Doing that sneaking up on other people and surprising them, business. [Scoffing] Peace be with you. I’ll give you peace—a piece of my fin! [Pretend to slap him.] Do you feel peaceful? Just check my heart rate.
Barnabas: But I’m just trying to be more like Jesus.
Lippo and Olivia: What?
Barnabas: You know. Like Jesus. After Easter. He kept surprising the disciples by showing up, unannounced. And saying things like: “Peace be with you.” It must have been quite startling. [Lippo and Olivia look away to make a face; Barnabas quickly ducks down under bench; Lippo and Olivia turn back to the front, discover him gone, then look forward, puzzled, when Barnabas pops up from in front, from under the bench]. Peace!
Lippo and Olivia: Ahhh! Would you stop doing that!?
Barnabas: But it’s in the Bible. Here, look. [Reading] “While the disciples were talking together, Jesus himself stood among them and said: ‘Peace be with you.’ And they were startled and terrified.” See? You did the “startled and terrified” part just right.
Olivia: [Grabbing Bible] “And Jesus said, ‘why are you frightened? Remember my words that I spoke to you while I was still with you—that everything written about me in the law of Moses, the prophets, and the psalms must be fulfilled.”
Lippo: [Grabbing Bible] “Thus it is written, that the Messiah is to suffer and to rise from the dead on the third day, and that repentance and forgiveness of sins is to be proclaimed in his name to all nations.” Wow!
Barnabas: Now, after your initial surprise, you’re supposed to be expressing great joy right about now! As you disciples walk along with me on the road from Jerusalem to Bethany.
Olivia: We are! Because, it’s, it’s so amazing! We saw Jesus, we saw you die, on the cross. But
you’re alive. Just as the Scriptures said! Now we understand! Jesus is alive. He’s risen. [HE IS RISEN INDEED] He is risen. [HE IS RISEN INDEED] He is risen. [HE IS RISEN INDEED] [Barnabas disappears again during the shouting]. Hey, where’d you go this time?
Lippo: [Reading] Look. It says: “Then having led them out as far as Bethany, Jesus lifted up his hands, and he blessed them. And while he was blessing them, he withdrew and was carried up into heaven.” Wow. The ascension.
Olivia: Ahh. But Jesus promised that God would send the Holy Spirit. And that he—Jesus—would always be with us.
Barnabas: [From under the bench] I’m still here.
Lippo and Olivia: We know.
Barnabas: Bless you, may peace be with you, and God’s love now and forever, holding you tight.
Olivia: Thank you Jesus. Whatever you do, don’t stop doing that.
All: Now, is this a great day or what?
Walk On
By: Marvin Lansverk
Church Year: Season of Lent and Easter
Title: Walk On
Bible Text: Matthew, the Road to Emmaus
Theme:
Puppets: Barnabas and Lorenzo
People: Kids
Props: Sunglasses and moustache (thin horizontal strip cut out of construction paper) for Lorenzo
Songs: Barnabas and Lorenzo chant a rap together
[Barnabas and Lorenzo are up front, Lorenzo wearing sunglasses and pencil thin mustache]
Barnabas: Buenos dias boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Lorenzo: [In sunglasses and mustache] Hola kids. You look marvelous this morning, simply marvelous.
Barnabas: And you, Lorenzo, you look…you look…different. Is everything alright?
Lorenzo: Of course. Don’t you recognize contemporeneity when you see it?
Barnabas: Contemporeneity?
Lorenzo: Contemporeneity. You know, the state of being “with it,” “up to date,” as in “contemporary.”
Barnabas: As in “cool?”
Lorenzo: Cool, schmool. That word is so passé. Contemporeneity is the new cool word for being cool.
Barnabas: But, but…how does one use it? When someone does something coo…I mean “with it,” you don’t say: “Wow, that thing you just did was really, like contemporaneous, man.” I mean, by the time you got done saying all that, whatever you’d done that was cool would probably already be passé too, wouldn’t it?
Lorenzo: Ah. That’s just it. Contemporeneity isn’t a word you have to say, it’s just a thing, an “isness,” so to speak. That’s what makes it so cool. I mean contemporaneous.
Barnabas: Cool. I mean contemporaneous, man! But, don’t you think we might stop being contemporaneous up here long enough that we could actually do today’s puppet show?
Lorenzo: Ah. But puppet shows are so uncontemporaneous.
Barnabas: Whaaat?!?
Lorenzo: As in passé. I was thinking instead that it would be much more hip to be in a rock band than in a puppet show. [Play air guitar and hum: doo-doo-doo, doo-doo-doo, doo-doo, do] Don’t you think? Then instead of puppeting up here each week, we could sing, and jump around, and play guitars, and shake our heads, and get famous.
Barnabas: But we are puppets.
Lorenzo: OK, ok, so we’ll be puppet rock stars. But instead of calling us Barnabas and Olivia, which is a title I never really understood very well anyway. I mean the Barnabas part seems ok, but when I’m here, then it’s not really [singing] Barnabas and Olivia. So I thought the name of our rock band should be “Lorenzo and the Pencil Thin Mustachios.”
Barnabas: Maybe we can work on the name later… Wait a minute!!! What am I talking about? As if there is going to be a later. For your idea, I mean, as if we were actually going to become a puppet rock band.
Lorenzo: Well, how about if we just try it, this once. Just for today.
Barnabas: But, but.
Lorenzo: Please? Besides, Pastor Dave’s not here.
Barnabas: Ok. But only if it has to do with today’s Bible story.
Lorenzo: [Scoff weirdly] Of course it does…So, what is today’s Bible story?
Barnabas: It’s about the road to Emmaus! You know, when a couple of Jesus’ followers were walking towards the city of Emmaus, alone, still terrified and lost, because Jesus, their Lord, the Lord, had been crucified.
Lorenzo: Ah. I know this one. And then suddenly the risen Jesus appeared on the road with them, but somehow the disciples didn’t recognize him. And Jesus came up behind them and said, “hey, what’s up?”
Barnabas: And they said, “What’s up? Are you the only person in Jerusalem who doesn’t know what’s been happening the last few days, who hasn’t been keeping up with contemporaneous events? [Barnabas and Lorenzo both look at each other]. Don’t you know that they have taken Jesus of Nazareth, and crucified him, Jesus, who was the Messiah, but now he’s dead, dead for three days.
Lorenzo: And not only that, but then this morning, when some of our friends went to the tomb to be near Jesus’ body, the tomb was open, and his body was gone, and there were angels there instead, and they were saying that Jesus was alive. And…and…we just don’t understand what it all means, which is why we are sad.
Barnabas: And there on the road, Jesus must have wanted to say something like…[hold up hands], “you big bozos, don’t you get it? But instead, he explained scripture to them, beginning with Moses and all the prophets, until they invited him to dinner with them, and then, when they were breaking bread, they finally saw…they understood…they realized…it was the risen Lord. And he vanished from their sight.
Lorenzo: Ah. Now listen to this: The Road to Emmaus. [Barnabas chanting, with Lorenzo joining him on the capitalized rhymes]
Jesus’ friends were walkin down the roadThe road they were walkin to EMMAUS
Their world had just ended with the death of the LordEvents have conspired to BETRAY US.
When there, in their midst, a stranger appeared“What’s the matter,” he said, what’s the BIG FUSS?“
You haven’t heard? Not a word?—Then you’re the only one.Come on then, we’ll tell you, come this WAY WITH US.
We’d had big plans for the Kingdom of GodWith Jesus there to CONVEY USHis message of peace and love to us allNothing could possibly DELAY US
But it did. They killed him. And we don’t know what to do.Nothing’s left. All that is, just DISMAYS US.Now it is over and all done—and we are on the run.And our lives have become a CLICHÉ TO US.
Then he said: “think, friends, you know what has been writBy the prophets who were sent to ALLAY USAnd your fears, through the years, listen all ye who have earsThis is God’s plan, it’s OK FOR US.”
So we begged him to stay, to eat with us that dayAt the table we said, please PRAY WITH US.And he did: [Stop singing, Lorenzo takes off glasses and moustache…speaking slowly and emphatically now]
Lorenzo: He said: “this is my body, broken for you…This is my blood shed for you…Do this in remembrance of me.”And we did…We remembered…And we recognized him…It was Jesus. He was alive. Our Lord…The one who had PAID FOR US.
Barnabas: Wow. But what happened to being “with it,” with contemporaneity?
Lorenzo: I guess you don’t really need cool when you’re dealing with timeless truth and boundless love. [Both look at each other, shrug, and grin]
All: Amen!! Jesus is alive. Now, is this a great day or what?Easter Unwrapped
Puppets: Barnabas, Olivia, and Fodder People: Kids Songs: Lord’s Prayer
[Barnabas, Olivia, and Fodder are all up front, Olivia in the middle]
Barnabas: Buenos dias, boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Olivia: Hi kids. It’s good to see you all here this morning.
Fodder: Gooood mornnnning Methodists! Whaaaaat’s happpenin?
Barnabas: I don’t know what’s happening. But I do know what I’m wondering.
Olivia: What’s that, Barnabas?
Barnabas: I was wondering whether Jesus knew Kung Fu.
Fodder: What?
Barnabas: Well, what I was really wondering was why Jesus didn’t fight back. When they came to get him in the Garden of Gethsemene, you know, with Judas betraying him, and the soldiers coming to arrest him. Why didn’t Jesus fight back? He could have.
Olivia: Hmm.
Fodder: I know what you mean. When the soldiers came to grab Jesus, why didn’t he just do some Jesus jujitsu? [Pause]
Olivia: [Quietly] He did.
Fodder and Barnabas: He did?
Olivia: That’s exactly what he did. Jesus jujitsu—responding not by fighting back, not with violence, but by responding with words. With the Word.
Fodder and Barnabas: Huh?
Olivia: Don’t you get it? There he was, in the garden, in the Kidron valley, Jesus with his disciples, a place that he liked to go, to find peace. And Judas knew it. And Judas took advantage of it. Judas knew that Jesus liked that place. So Judas led the solders there, and the police, the police from the chief priests and Pharisees, and they came there in the night with lanterns and torches and weapons.
Barnabas: It sounds like they expected Jesus to fight back. Pow. Kachine. Zowee.
Olivia: But Jesus, knowing all that was to happen to him, came forward in the dark to them, and he asked them: “Whom are you looking for?”
Fodder: And they answered: “Jesus of Nazareth.”
Olivia: Exactly. And that’s when Jesus did his jujitsu.
Fodder and Barnabas: Huh?
Olivia: Here, maybe it will be easier if I tell you a story first.
Barnabas: OK.
Fodder: I like stories.
Olivia: So, there was Moses, walking in the desert, looking for one of his lost sheep.
Barnabas: Moses? Is this another Bible story?
Olivia: Shh. And then suddenly, Moses saw something…weird…something… strange…something that made his hair stand up on the back of his neck.
Fodder: That happened to me the first time I saw canned salmon.
Olivia: No, really. You know what Moses saw, it was a bush, on fire, but it wasn’t burning up. And it was God there. And God called him by name, saying: “Moses, Moses.”
Barnabas: I know. We’ve studied this in Sunday School. And God called on Moses to be a leader, to go back and lead the Israelites out of slavery in Egypt, saying that he, God would help.
Olivia: But Moses was nervous about all this. So he asked his famous question:
Fodder: What question?
Barnabas: He said to God: “What is your name?”
Olivia: And God didn’t yell, or get mad, or…not answer. God did answer, and He said: “I am who I am. And if anyone asks, or wonders why you are doing these things, then tell them that ‘I am’ has sent you.”
Fodder: O….K!? Olivia: So listen. There is Jesus in the dark. With the disciples, who are scared. They know something big is going to happen. Jesus has been talking about it, at the Last Supper, and before.
Barnabas: Right. So here comes Judas, and the soldiers, and the police, in the dark, with their weapons, and their fear, and their hate.
Fodder: And Jesus steps out into the circle of light, from their torches, and says: “Whom are you looking for?” And in their anger they yell out the answer, “Jesus of Nazareth,” the right answer, if only they’d seen it, the one whom we all are looking for.
Barnabas: [Quietly] “Whom are you looking for?”
Fodder: And they say, “Jesus of Nazareth!”
Olivia: And that’s when Jesus responds, with…the Word. He says: [slowly and emphatically “I am.” [Fodder and Barnabas both fall backwards, as if in a faint, with a clunk]Exactly. That’s exactly what Jesus’ disciples did, when they heard Jesus say that. Because they understood.
Barnabas: [Getting back up] I am! The name of God, the same as from the burning bush. Jesus was telling them that…that he…was…God.
Fodder: It was what he’d been saying all along, for those who would listen: in his stories, in his teaching, in his words: I am…I am the way…I am the resurrection and the light. I am here.
Olivia: And he’s telling it to us. [Praying] Thank you Jesus. Thank you for words so that we can pray to you, and say thank you, for your undying love. Thank you, Lord.
All: Now, is this a great day join in and pray, or not? [Sing Lord’s Prayer
The First Last SupperSeason of Lent .... The First Last Supper .... Matthew 26:26-29: The Last Supper .... Jesus in the bread and wine.
Puppets: Barnabas and LorenzoPeople: 2 kids to hold up blanket; five or six kids to be the disciples posing in Da Vinci’s The Last Supper; KidsProps: White sheet, as a tablecloth for puppet bench; communion cup and bread plate; biblical dress for kids, as disciples in Da Vinci painting; bed sheet or blanket; copy of Da Vinci’s painting: The Last Supper, if available
[Arrange to have five or six kids in disciple dress hiding behind altar, ready to come out. Also arrange to have two kids or adults to hold up the sheet]
[Barnabas and Lorenzo are up front; the tablecloth and communion elements are in the prop bag. The copy of the painting is propped up so everyone can see it. The disciple kids are hiding, and the drape holders are sitting up front, ready to go]
Barnabas: Buenos dias boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Lorenzo: Hola ninos. You all look marvelous this morning,simply marvelous.
Barnabas: So. Lorenzo. Are you excited about today’samazing attempt?
Lorenzo: Attempt?
Barnabas: It’s that time of year again.
Lorenzo: What time?
Barnabas: The time when we present a living reenactment of Da Vinci’s famous painting of The Last Supper, in honor of…The Last Supper.
Lorenzo: But there are only two of us. [Counting] Uno, Dos. We can’t enact a whole painting of Jesus and the twelve disciples, with just the two of us.
Barnabas: We can if we move fast.
Lorenzo: All right. But I've got a bad feeling about this. [Prop assistants hold up blanket in front of puppeteers; then drop it, revealing Barnabas and Lorenzo striking a Da Vinci pose. Now speaking to each other out of the sides of their mouths] Aye carumba. The only amazing thing here is how much this doesn’t look like Da Vinci’s painting of The Last Supper.
Barnabas: You’re right.
Lorenzo: So what do we do now?
Barnabas: We start talking about something else quick, so they’llstop thinking about how embarrassing this looks and start thinking about something else.
Lorenzo: Are they really that easy to distract? [Barnabas nods]OK. [Start humming, filling a long pause. Eventually look over and shrug] I know. Let’s talk about if Jesus’ disciples knew that he was dyslexic.
Barnabas: If they knew that he was what?
Lorenzo: You know. Dyslexic. That condition that lots of people have, when they read, when the letters look like they’re backwards or reversed and stuff. After all, Jesus was always going around reversing words: you know, saying that small things were actually big things. And how the first would be last, and the last, first.
Barnabas: That’s not dyslexia…..It’s wisdom.
Lorenzo: [Give Barnabas a long stare] And Jesus was doing it again in today’s Bible story, switching first and last, on that evening, near the end, that we call the Last Supper.
Barnabas: What?
Lorenzo: You know. The story of the Last Supper. But it wasn’t really the last supper. It was the first supper, the first communion, the first Eucharist, when Jesus ate with his disciples, and he told them to continue to eat bread and drink wine together like that, to remember him. He said last, but it was first. Viola: dyslexia.
Barnabas: [Aside] (That should be voila: dyslexia).
Lorenzo: [Aside] (Sorry, I’m dyslexic.) Anyway: voila dyslexia.
Barnabas: But, but, but…it wasn’t just the first supper; it was also the last supper, the last time Jesus ate with his disciples before he was taken by the Romans, and crucified. The Last Supper. In other words, Jesus was not dyslexic.
Lorenzo: Hmm. The first supper and the last supper. I wonder if you can be both dyslexic and not dyslexic—at the same time? Maybe that’s what Jesus was. What’s the word for that?
Barnabas: God.
Lorenzo: [Pause] Oh. [Pause] God. As in omni-lexic. All words. As in “In the beginning was the Word.” I get it. Jesus. As in Jesus in the bread and the wine and the words: “take, eat, this is my body, broken for you. This is my blood, shed for you.” The word made flesh.
Barnabas: Which gives me a better idea for our Last Supper reenactment. We just needed more flesh. [Prop assistants hold up blanket. Quickly spread white sheet, as tablecloth on puppet bench, then put communion elements in middle; hiding kids come out from behind altar in costume, kneeling behind the bench and strike a pose. Assistants drop blanket. Lorenzo and Barnabas move around over to the side, looking on.]
Lorenzo: I don’t know if it looks exactly like the painting or not, but at least this time Jesus is there. In the bread and wine. Right in the middle. With his disciples. The kids. Right where he belongs.
Barnabas: [Praying] Amen! Come Lord Jesus, we’re you’re guests. Let these gifts to us be blest. Thank you Lord for Communion, for the first, and last, and lasting supper. Amen.
All: [Including the posing kids and puppets] Now, is this a great day, or what?
Puppets: Barnabas, Olivia, and Fodder
People: Confirmation Kids: Allison, Trevor, Laura, Kyle, Jesse; and Kids
Props: Astrolabe (made from three rulers rubber banded together) and Bell
[Fodder, Olivia, and Barnabas are up front, Fodder on one end. Sitting in front facing the congregation are the five confirmation kids]
Barnabas: Buenos dias boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Olivia: Hi kids. It’s good to see you all here, on Confirmation Sunday.
Fodder: Confirmation Sunday?
Barnabas: [With astrolabe] Yup. I can definitely confirm—based on the position of the sun and stars—that this is Sunday, May 21st, to be exact. [Toss astrolabe aside]
Fodder: Oh. In that case: Gooood morning Methodist’s. Whaaat’s happenin?
Olivia: We just told you what’s happening. It’s Confirmation Sunday—the day when we celebrate our youth joining the church as new members—after taking Confirmation classes this spring.
Fodder: Ah. But how are we to confirm that they really are confirmable? Shouldn’t we have them…give a demonstration?
Barnabas: A demonstration?
Olivia: Good idea. I know, let’s have them demonstrate their biblical and theological knowledge by putting it to the test—in head to head competition.
Fodder: With each other?
Olivia: With you. [Plop down bell] Please ring in if you know the answer.
Barnabas: First question. Name the first four… [Fodder rings in]
Fodder: Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John!
Barnabas: Very nice. But wrong. Confirmation team? Name the first four… [ring in. Team confers in whispers.]
Allison: “The oracle that the.”
Barnabas: Correct. Confirmation team 1, Fodder team 0.
Fodder: “The oracle that the?” What kind of an answer is that?
Barnabas: It’s the answer to this question: “Name the first four words of the book of Habbukuk.”
Olivia: OK. Next question. [Confirmation team rings in]
Trevor: One thousand, four hundred and four!
Olivia: Correct. Confirmation Team 2, Non Confirmation Team 0.
Fodder: Wait a minute. What was the question?
Olivia: Oh. Sorry. It was: “How many times does the word, “O,” appear in the Bible…as in “’O Lord God, what wilt thou give me?’” And 1,404 is correct.
Barnabas: Next question. [Confirmation Team rings in. Team confers in whispers]
Laura: Yes. The answer is “yes.”
Fodder: But…
Barnabas: [Leaning toward kids] Correct. The answer is “yes” [leaning towards Fodder] not “but.” And it’s a three-part question: “is it true that Jews don't recognize Jesus as the Messiah. That Protestants don't recognize the Pope as head of the church…And that Methodists don't recognize each other in the liquor store?” Let’s see. That gives the Confirmation Team 3, and the “Yet-to-Answer-a Question-Correctly Team” zero.
Fodder: Team? How can you call me a team, when there’s only one of me?...This isn’t fair.
Olivia: But you have a graduate degree in divinity. [Slowly] While for advanced theological study they have only just started to have a degree of affinity.
Barnabas: Next question: And just to be polite, maybe this time, you can all wait for the question to actually be read first, instead of relying on E.S.P.
Fodder: E.S.P.? Is that what they’re using?
Olivia: Educated strategic predictions.
Fodder: Oh.
Trevor: [Ringing in] One thousand, four hundred and four!
Fodder: You’re not getting points for that again! You already did that one.
Olivia: Ah. And the next one is a definition question: Please define biblical liter…[Fodder rings in]
Fodder: Biblical litter. What the Methodist men picked up by the side of the road last weekend!
Olivia: Sorry.
Kyle: [Team confers first] Biblical literacy! The condition or quality of being knowledgeable in matters having to do with the Bible and or Christianity. As in…what our team seems to possess—in abundance, thanks to Confirmation.
Olivia: Correct. Well done. Let’s see. That gives our Confirmation Team…
Fodder: All right, all right already. We know the score. This is beginning to feel like one of our softball games.
Barnabas: Anyway. We’re almost done. And to make it more interesting let’s make this one worth five points. Please name…[Fodder rings in, smugly]
Fodder: Eunice, Steve, Judy…and Howard.
Barnabas: Sorry. Those are characters in the Ryan O Neil-Barbra Streisand movie, What’s Up Doc? How about you guys?
Allison: Let’s see. Eunice is right. But then it's Steven. And Judith. But no Howard. Unless you count “Howard be thy name,” the way some kids say the Lord’s Prayer, when they’re little.”
Barnabas: Right! And the question was: "Name one man and two women in the Bible, one of whom is named in today’s Bible story." Which happens to be Eunice.
Fodder: Eunice? There’s a person in the Bible named Eunice?
Barnabas: Sure. She was Lois's mother, and Timothy's grandmother. Their whole extended family joined the church, just as these kids are today, working to spread the good news.
Olivia: And for our last—winner-takes-all question—hmmm..I got it, "do any of you know that great eighteenth century musical composition that celebrates God’s beautiful creation: Vivaldi’s Four Season.. [Confirmation team rings in. Confer.]
Jesse: Yes. [Grab violin and play a few runs!]
Barnabas: And to think that before Confirmation, he didn’t even know how to play a kazoo!
Olivia: Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls. I have the pleasure to introduce to you, the winners of our little Confirmation demonstration, our youth, who are winners by almost any definition you can think of. Because they are loved by God, and they know it. And so do we. Let’s give them all a hand.
All: Now, is this a great day or what?
A Night at the Opera
Season of Lent and Easter, Acts 4:32-37, 9:26-28, 11:19-30: Barnabas and Paul. Encouragement. Mother's Day.
Puppets: Barnabas, Olivia, and Fodder
People: Piano player and Kids
Songs: Brief themes from various operas: Mozart, Puccini, and then Bizet's Carmen:
[Barnabas, Olivia, and Fodder are up front, Fodder on one end.]
Barnabas: Buenos dias boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Olivia: Hi kids. It’s good to see you all here this morning.
Fodder: Gooood morrrrning Methodists! Whaaat’s happenin?
Barnabas: What’s happenin? I’ll tell you what’s happenin. I wrote an opera last night.
Olivia: Last night?
Barnabas: Well, actually it was more like this morning. I got inspired by seeing the one in town this weekend. And I thought if someone could write a four hour opera about…. that… then I certainly should be able to write one about today’s Bible story.
Fodder: What do you mean? What was the opera about?
Barnabas: [Slight pause] I have no idea. [Pause] I couldn’t see the subtitles from where I was sitting—way in the back. But it was mostly about a guy singing “I love you, I love you,” and a girl singing “I love you too, ummm, maybe I don’t, well, yes I do, but I don’t feel so well all of a sudden, but maybe if you sing really loudly into my ear I’ll feel better, unless I...” [pantomime her dying]. You know, that kind of opera stuff.
Fodder: Cool. So what’s your opera about?
Barnabas: Like I said. About today’s Bible story.
Olivia: But which story is it?
Barnabas: Hmm, funny you should ask. It happens to be the New Testament story today,
about Paul’s friend, one of the more important early apostles, who helped start some of the earliest churches, whose name means “the Encourager.”
Fodder: But your name means “the Encourager.”
Barnabas: You’re right! Well, how about that. Today’s story is about Barnabas.
Fodder: You wrote an opera about yourself?
Barnabas: Well, they always say to write about what you know. Besides, it’s not really about me! It’s about the Bible Barnabas. The one I was named after. About Barnabas the Encourager! You remember the story, don’t you?
Olivia: Of course I do. How could I forget—Mom must have told it to us a hundred times: Once there was a man from Cyprus, named Joseph.
Fodder: Joseph?
Olivia: Joseph. And soon after Easter, he heard about Jesus, and he believed. And he wanted to help. So he sold all he had and became an apostle. And from then on, he was called Barnabas--the Encourager.
Barnabas: And I encourage you to hurry up and finish telling this, so we can start my opera!
Olivia: Right. So Barnabas was the one who met Paul right after Paul's road to Damascus experience, when the risen Jesus appeared to Paul. It was Barnabas who first befriended Paul, who then introduced him to Jesus’ other disciples, convincing them that Paul was now on their side.
Barnabas: And he spent a lot of time with Paul starting a new church in Antioch, where the followers of Jesus were first called "Christians." Barnabas was a great encourager, which is why he was renamed “Barnabas” when he became a Christian.
Fodder: [Slightly irritated] OK, Ok. So we know that Barnabas is in the Bible [aside] (and that Fodder isn’t—except as camel food). And we know that Barnabas was friends with Paul [aside] (and that Fodder wasn't, though presumably Paul's donkey was fond of donkey fodder). And we know that now you’ve written an opera about it all—(all except the donkey fodder, I'm sure). So let’s hear it. How does this Barnabastic opera of yours go?
Barnabas: Well, I didn’t have time to compose the music yet. Just the words. So until I have time to do the music, we’ll just have to make do with second hand.
Olivia: Second hand lines? [Everybody gives a weird look]
Barnabas: Not second hand lines. Second hand music!
Piano Player: OK then. How about a little Mozart? [Play a line or two, Barnabas shakes head] Puccini? [Play a line or two, Barnabas shakes head] Bizet? [Play something from Carmen]
Barnabas: That’s it!
Fodder: Sheesh! If I’d written an opera last night, I would have taken the time to write the music, as well. When it comes to music, I am a true sophisticate. No one I know has a better appreciation for music.
Barnabas and Olivia: Shh! [Piano starts, march theme from Carmen]
Barnabas: [Singing, mangling the song to fit this rhythm, which it doesn't really]Barnabas and Olivia from Bolivia, Barnabas and Olivia from Bolivia That's in South America, what have you got to say? What have you got to say?Barnabas and Olivia from BoliviaTell us a story today.
Olivia: That song sounds strangely familiar.
Fodder: [Scoffing] That’s because it’s just the words of our regular theme song, sung to a different tune!
Barnabas: Well what if it is? I was just getting warmed up. And I encourage you to keep quiet during this next aria, so as not to disturb its beautiful virtuosity. [Piano starts theme from Carmen]
Olivia: [Singing] Ha ha ha ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, (etc).
Fodder: Second hand lines? It sounds more like second hand syllables. How long did it take you to come up with that one?
Barnabas: Shh. Olivia was supposed to be sounding happy. And she did. But please be quiet. The dramatic part is about to start. [Piano starts chromatic intro riff from Phantom of the Opera]
Barnabas and Olivia: [Singing, version of "The Phantom of the Opera is there, inside your mind"]Olivia and Barnabas are there, inside your church.Olivia and Barnabas won’t leave you in the lurch.
Fodder: [Sarcastically] Now that is inspiring. But what does any of this have to do with mothers, huh? It is Mother’s Day you know. [Or some other nearby holiday, as needed] Did Your Operaticusness [ah-per-AT-i-kiss-ness] remember that?
Barnabas and Olivia: [Replay chromatic Phantom piano riff as intro, then Barnabas and Olivia break into march from Carmen again instead, with piano accompaniment]Happy happy mother’s day, happy mother’s dayHappy happy mother’s day, happy mother’s dayHappy, hap hap hap happy mother’s dayHappy mother’s day. [Look at each other and shrug while piano finishes]
Olivia: Happy Barnabas Day! Happy Mother’s Day! [Look at Fodder] And what the heck, happy Fodder’s Day!
Barnabas: I encourage you all to get out and enjoy this beautiful day that the Lord has made.
All: Amen. Now, is this a great day or what?
Tuesday, May 09, 2006 Information About These Puppet Show Scripts
These puppet show scripts are performed each week at Bozeman United Methodist Church as part of the "chidren's time" portion of one of our worship services. They typically have two to three performers, from our team of puppeters. They are written each week by Marvin Lansverk, a professor of English at Montana State University, to supplement the Bible text that the Sunday School curriculum is focusing on that day. We don't rehearse these--or memorize them. Instead, they are emailed out in advance presented, reader's theater style. We use hand puppets and we do not use a puppet stage. Our performers are part of the performance.Puppet show scripts. Church puppets. Puppet shows for use in churches. Marvin Lansverk. Bozeman United Methodist Church. Puppet Scripts. Puppet Scripts for churches. Humorous. Funny. Hilarious. Christian puppet scripts. For any denomination. Methodist. Lutheran. Presbyterian. United Church of Christ. Congregational. Southern Baptist. American Baptist. Episcopalian. Evangelical Lutheran Church of America. ELCA.
Don't Stop Doing ThatBy: Marvin Lansverk
Church Year: Season of Lent and Easter
Title: Don't Stop Doing That
Bible Text: Luke 24:36-53, The Ascension
Theme: Jesus is with us
Puppets: Barnabas, Olivia, and Lippo
People: Kids
Props: Bible
[Tell kids to shout "HE IS RISEN INDEED," louder each time, at end]
[Lippo, Barnabas, and Olivia are up front, Barnabas in the middle]
Barnabas: Buenos dias kids. How is everybody today?
Olivia: Hi kids. It’s good to see you all here this morning. Hey look, it’s Lippo. It seems like we haven’t seen you since…before Brittney Spears was popular!
Lippo: Brittney Spears was popular?
Barnabas: [Feeling around] Hey, maybe we’re not actually seeing you now. Maybe we just hear you. [Pause] Wait….now I can’t even hear you. Shoot, maybe the whole thing was just my imagination.
[Lippo gives Barnabas a big smacking kiss]
Barnabas: Now I see you! It’s amazing what big pink smacking lips will do for your vison of reality. Lippo! We’ve missed you.
Lippo: And I’ve missed you. But I’ve been on one of those reality t.v. shows for a while—for the denomination.
Olivia: Really? What, like Methodist Survivor, or the Methodist Apprentice, or something? Cool, and instead of standing up and saying “you’re fired,” did the Bishop stand up and say: “You’re excommunicated!”
Lippo: No, no. Actually, I was just part of the ambiance on the set of American Idol. I was one of the fish swimming back and forth in the aquarium in the background.
Barnabas: But you said for the denomination.
Lippo: Yah. You know, for tens and twenties.
Olivia: Maybe we should be getting on with it. So just what is “it” today?
Barnabas: Oo. I just remembered something. I’ll be back in a minute. [Lippo and Olivia both look at each other and shrug]
Olivia: We’re supposed to be talking about the ascension.
Lippo: Ah. Whales and penguins do that.
Olivia: What?!?
Lippo: You know, they dive in the sea [make gesture], and eventually they come bursting out above the surface. [Make noise—pssshhh—and rising gesture]. Like that. Ascension.
Olivia: But, but…
Barnabas: [Sneak up behind them] Peace be with you!
Olivia and Lippo: Ahhhh!
Olivia: Would you stop doing that!?!
Barnabas: Doing what?
Lippo: Doing that sneaking up on other people and surprising them, business. [Scoffing] Peace be with you. I’ll give you peace—a piece of my fin! [Pretend to slap him.] Do you feel peaceful? Just check my heart rate.
Barnabas: But I’m just trying to be more like Jesus.
Lippo and Olivia: What?
Barnabas: You know. Like Jesus. After Easter. He kept surprising the disciples by showing up, unannounced. And saying things like: “Peace be with you.” It must have been quite startling. [Lippo and Olivia look away to make a face; Barnabas quickly ducks down under bench; Lippo and Olivia turn back to the front, discover him gone, then look forward, puzzled, when Barnabas pops up from in front, from under the bench]. Peace!
Lippo and Olivia: Ahhh! Would you stop doing that!?
Barnabas: But it’s in the Bible. Here, look. [Reading] “While the disciples were talking together, Jesus himself stood among them and said: ‘Peace be with you.’ And they were startled and terrified.” See? You did the “startled and terrified” part just right.
Olivia: [Grabbing Bible] “And Jesus said, ‘why are you frightened? Remember my words that I spoke to you while I was still with you—that everything written about me in the law of Moses, the prophets, and the psalms must be fulfilled.”
Lippo: [Grabbing Bible] “Thus it is written, that the Messiah is to suffer and to rise from the dead on the third day, and that repentance and forgiveness of sins is to be proclaimed in his name to all nations.” Wow!
Barnabas: Now, after your initial surprise, you’re supposed to be expressing great joy right about now! As you disciples walk along with me on the road from Jerusalem to Bethany.
Olivia: We are! Because, it’s, it’s so amazing! We saw Jesus, we saw you die, on the cross. But
you’re alive. Just as the Scriptures said! Now we understand! Jesus is alive. He’s risen. [HE IS RISEN INDEED] He is risen. [HE IS RISEN INDEED] He is risen. [HE IS RISEN INDEED] [Barnabas disappears again during the shouting]. Hey, where’d you go this time?
Lippo: [Reading] Look. It says: “Then having led them out as far as Bethany, Jesus lifted up his hands, and he blessed them. And while he was blessing them, he withdrew and was carried up into heaven.” Wow. The ascension.
Olivia: Ahh. But Jesus promised that God would send the Holy Spirit. And that he—Jesus—would always be with us.
Barnabas: [From under the bench] I’m still here.
Lippo and Olivia: We know.
Barnabas: Bless you, may peace be with you, and God’s love now and forever, holding you tight.
Olivia: Thank you Jesus. Whatever you do, don’t stop doing that.
All: Now, is this a great day or what?
Walk On
By: Marvin Lansverk
Church Year: Season of Lent and Easter
Title: Walk On
Bible Text: Matthew, the Road to Emmaus
Theme:
Puppets: Barnabas and Lorenzo
People: Kids
Props: Sunglasses and moustache (thin horizontal strip cut out of construction paper) for Lorenzo
Songs: Barnabas and Lorenzo chant a rap together
[Barnabas and Lorenzo are up front, Lorenzo wearing sunglasses and pencil thin mustache]
Barnabas: Buenos dias boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Lorenzo: [In sunglasses and mustache] Hola kids. You look marvelous this morning, simply marvelous.
Barnabas: And you, Lorenzo, you look…you look…different. Is everything alright?
Lorenzo: Of course. Don’t you recognize contemporeneity when you see it?
Barnabas: Contemporeneity?
Lorenzo: Contemporeneity. You know, the state of being “with it,” “up to date,” as in “contemporary.”
Barnabas: As in “cool?”
Lorenzo: Cool, schmool. That word is so passé. Contemporeneity is the new cool word for being cool.
Barnabas: But, but…how does one use it? When someone does something coo…I mean “with it,” you don’t say: “Wow, that thing you just did was really, like contemporaneous, man.” I mean, by the time you got done saying all that, whatever you’d done that was cool would probably already be passé too, wouldn’t it?
Lorenzo: Ah. That’s just it. Contemporeneity isn’t a word you have to say, it’s just a thing, an “isness,” so to speak. That’s what makes it so cool. I mean contemporaneous.
Barnabas: Cool. I mean contemporaneous, man! But, don’t you think we might stop being contemporaneous up here long enough that we could actually do today’s puppet show?
Lorenzo: Ah. But puppet shows are so uncontemporaneous.
Barnabas: Whaaat?!?
Lorenzo: As in passé. I was thinking instead that it would be much more hip to be in a rock band than in a puppet show. [Play air guitar and hum: doo-doo-doo, doo-doo-doo, doo-doo, do] Don’t you think? Then instead of puppeting up here each week, we could sing, and jump around, and play guitars, and shake our heads, and get famous.
Barnabas: But we are puppets.
Lorenzo: OK, ok, so we’ll be puppet rock stars. But instead of calling us Barnabas and Olivia, which is a title I never really understood very well anyway. I mean the Barnabas part seems ok, but when I’m here, then it’s not really [singing] Barnabas and Olivia. So I thought the name of our rock band should be “Lorenzo and the Pencil Thin Mustachios.”
Barnabas: Maybe we can work on the name later… Wait a minute!!! What am I talking about? As if there is going to be a later. For your idea, I mean, as if we were actually going to become a puppet rock band.
Lorenzo: Well, how about if we just try it, this once. Just for today.
Barnabas: But, but.
Lorenzo: Please? Besides, Pastor Dave’s not here.
Barnabas: Ok. But only if it has to do with today’s Bible story.
Lorenzo: [Scoff weirdly] Of course it does…So, what is today’s Bible story?
Barnabas: It’s about the road to Emmaus! You know, when a couple of Jesus’ followers were walking towards the city of Emmaus, alone, still terrified and lost, because Jesus, their Lord, the Lord, had been crucified.
Lorenzo: Ah. I know this one. And then suddenly the risen Jesus appeared on the road with them, but somehow the disciples didn’t recognize him. And Jesus came up behind them and said, “hey, what’s up?”
Barnabas: And they said, “What’s up? Are you the only person in Jerusalem who doesn’t know what’s been happening the last few days, who hasn’t been keeping up with contemporaneous events? [Barnabas and Lorenzo both look at each other]. Don’t you know that they have taken Jesus of Nazareth, and crucified him, Jesus, who was the Messiah, but now he’s dead, dead for three days.
Lorenzo: And not only that, but then this morning, when some of our friends went to the tomb to be near Jesus’ body, the tomb was open, and his body was gone, and there were angels there instead, and they were saying that Jesus was alive. And…and…we just don’t understand what it all means, which is why we are sad.
Barnabas: And there on the road, Jesus must have wanted to say something like…[hold up hands], “you big bozos, don’t you get it? But instead, he explained scripture to them, beginning with Moses and all the prophets, until they invited him to dinner with them, and then, when they were breaking bread, they finally saw…they understood…they realized…it was the risen Lord. And he vanished from their sight.
Lorenzo: Ah. Now listen to this: The Road to Emmaus. [Barnabas chanting, with Lorenzo joining him on the capitalized rhymes]
Jesus’ friends were walkin down the roadThe road they were walkin to EMMAUS
Their world had just ended with the death of the LordEvents have conspired to BETRAY US.
When there, in their midst, a stranger appeared“What’s the matter,” he said, what’s the BIG FUSS?“
You haven’t heard? Not a word?—Then you’re the only one.Come on then, we’ll tell you, come this WAY WITH US.
We’d had big plans for the Kingdom of GodWith Jesus there to CONVEY USHis message of peace and love to us allNothing could possibly DELAY US
But it did. They killed him. And we don’t know what to do.Nothing’s left. All that is, just DISMAYS US.Now it is over and all done—and we are on the run.And our lives have become a CLICHÉ TO US.
Then he said: “think, friends, you know what has been writBy the prophets who were sent to ALLAY USAnd your fears, through the years, listen all ye who have earsThis is God’s plan, it’s OK FOR US.”
So we begged him to stay, to eat with us that dayAt the table we said, please PRAY WITH US.And he did: [Stop singing, Lorenzo takes off glasses and moustache…speaking slowly and emphatically now]
Lorenzo: He said: “this is my body, broken for you…This is my blood shed for you…Do this in remembrance of me.”And we did…We remembered…And we recognized him…It was Jesus. He was alive. Our Lord…The one who had PAID FOR US.
Barnabas: Wow. But what happened to being “with it,” with contemporaneity?
Lorenzo: I guess you don’t really need cool when you’re dealing with timeless truth and boundless love. [Both look at each other, shrug, and grin]
All: Amen!! Jesus is alive. Now, is this a great day or what?Easter Unwrapped
The Season of Easter .... Easter Unwrapped .... John 20:1-10: The Resurrection .... Jesus is Alive.
Puppets: Barnabas, Olivia, and FodderPeople: KidsProps: Bible, box, wrapped as birthday present, with removable lid
[Prompt everyone to yell “He is risen, indeed” at the end]
[Barnabas, Olivia, and Fodder are up front]
Barnabas: Buenos dias, boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Olivia: Hi kids. It’s good to see you all here this morning.
Fodder: Gooood morrrrrning Methodists! Whaaaat’s happpenin? Hey Barnabas, what have you got there?
Barnabas: It’s an Easter present for you guys. In all the excitement last week, I forgot to give it to you.
Olivia: Wow! Thanks, Barnabas. [Open it, revealing nothing inside]
Fodder: Gee, Barnabas. Everybody can always use more….nothing. It takes up so much less space than….something.
Barnabas: It’s the perfect Easter present. Get it? Because it’s empty. Like the tomb. The way things are supposed to be on Easter. It’s symbolical.
Fodder and Olivia: [Underwhelmed] Oh!
Barnabas: Isn’t it great? I’m hoping to start a whole new tradition here. One in stark contrast to all the commercialism and materialism that has been appurtenanced to Christmas. And one that is in stark contrast to all the commercial confectionarity of calories that has come to accompany Easter. Empty presents! The box is empty! I’ll make a fortune.
Olivia: You’re going to sell them?
Barnabas: Sure. You don’t think people will want to take the time to wrap up empty presents on their own, do you? Besides, it’s fun to buy stuff.
Fodder: Or in this case, it’s fun to buy stuff that’s not stuff.
Barnabas: Exactly. And come to think of it, I could branch out to beyond Easter to appeal to all the Earth Day advocates and critics of crass consumerism and commercialism in general. People could give each other empty presents for Christmas. And for birthdays. And for anniversaries. And to distinguish my empty present product line from those commercial hooligans who will inevitably try to copy my great idea, mine empty presents will come with special designer wrapping paper and a little fashion logo right in the middle of the box. So all your friends will know that you got yours from the original source. See my logo. Did you notice?
Olivia: It’s a little picture of you—holding fistfuls of money.
Barnabas: Do you think it’s too subtle?
Olivia: Barnabas! This has got to be the one of the dumbest ideas you’ve ever come up with. [Scoffing] Empty presents. They’re symbolical all right—of your empty brainpan.
Fodder: Now wait a minute. Let’s not be too quick to judge.
Barnabas: [Smugly] Judge not Olivia, lest you become an alliteratively named t.v. judge yourself--like Judge Judy.
Fodder: I think we should give this some thought. By doing a bit more research. Into the source. [Open Bible] Now, in John 20, it says, “Early on the first day of the week, while it was still dark [slam box over Barnabas’s head]
Barnabas: Hey, what is this?
Fodder: Is it dark in there?
Barnabas: What do you think?
Fodder: Good. Now, “Early on the first day of the week while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene came to the tomb…oops [slam box over Olivia, instead] and she saw that the stone had been removed from the tomb. So she ran [Olivia comes out and runs to Barnabas] and went to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one whom Jesus loved, and said to them, “They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we do not know where they have laid him.”
[Barnabas and Olivia still pantomiming this] Then Peter and the other disciple set out and went toward the tomb. The two were running together and when they arrived, Peter went in and saw the linen wrapping lying there and the cloth that had been on Jesus’ head, rolled up in a place by itself. Then the other disciple, also went in…and he saw…and believed.” He believed—even though he didn’t yet understand.
Barnabas: Wow. Maybe instead of selling empty presents for Easter…maybe we should just give people Bibles so they can read that story, again and again…And maybe for kids who can’t read yet, well, why not, maybe for everyone, we should just keep telling that story, again and again.
Fodder: [Reading] Then the other disciple also went into the tomb…and he saw…and he believed.
Olivia: Believing because of what you don’t see, and don’t understand. But have experienced: the remains of the resurrection, right there before your eyes.
Barnabas: And not just the remains—the memories, and the stories—but Jesus too. Alive. HE IS RISEN! [Repeat three times]
All: HE IS RISEN INDEED!!!!
Barnabas: [Turn over box, get inside] Hey. It’s snowing outside! After church, how about if we all go and do some sledding—in my new designer decorated box sled?
All: Now, is this a great day or what?
Life is Weird...I Mean BeautifulSeason of Lent and Easter .... Life is Weird, I Mean Beautiful .... John 12:12-19: Jesus Appears to the Disciples on the Beach .... God’s in the Amazing and the Ordinary .... Easter Sunday
Puppets: Barnabas, Fodder, and Lorenzo
[Barnabas, Lorenzo, and Fodder are up front; Lorenzo is chewing on a block of wood]
Barnabas: Buenos dias boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Fodder: Gooood morning Methodists! Whaat’s happening?
Lorenzo: Hola kids. You all look marvelous in your Easter clothes. Simply marvelous. [Go back to chewing]
Fodder: Hey Lorenzo, what are you doing?
Lorenzo: Hm?
Barnabas: He said, “hey Lorenzo, what are you doing?”
Lorenzo: Oh. I started reading Moby Dick, for school. [Long pause]
Barnabas: [To Fodder] He started reading Moby Dick, for school. [Barnabas and Fodder both shrug]
Lorenzo: You know, Moby Dick, about the big whale, with that famous opening scene, where Queequeg—he’s the one that’s different from the other characters—because of his tattoos. Come to think of it though…these days, having tattoos [look around] actually makes you…the same, rather than different. That’s weird.
Fodder: Can we get on with it, so that we can get on with getting on with the Bible story? This is Easter Sunday after all. Not Moby Dick Sunday.
Barnabas: Actually, I think that’s sometime in November.
Lorenzo: OK, Ok, so in the opening scene of Moby Dick, Queequeg is there with a totem, like this, it’s his god, and he doesn’t quite like the way it looks, so he changes it—by doing a little whittling. Like this [whittle out a chunk]…voilá!
Fodder: And you think we can do that with God?
Lorenzo: Well, no not really. But then I don’t have any tattoos.
Barnabas: Ahem. And what, pray tell, if anything, does this have to do with today’s Bible story, the Easter story, the reason that…they are all here today?
Lorenzo: Well, it’s weird too.
Barnabas and Fodder: What?
Lorenzo: Well, you have to admit, it is a bit weird isn’t it? I mean, the biggest thing in the world, in the…universe, has just happened. Jesus, the Son of God, Christ, was just crucified…and he didn’t stay dead. He came back. He conquered death.
Fodder and Barnabas: [Suspiciously] Yah
Lorenzo: Well if you were going to have God conquer death, and come back, would you have him come back as…a camp host…a beach picnic caterer…a fishing guide? (“Hey, try fishing over there”). Don’t you think you’d have him come back…big, awesome, amazing—maybe even a bit angry—and certainly glorious, amazingly glorious [look at carving]. That’s how I’d script it…or carve it [hold up wood].
Fodder: But that’s just it. We don’t…didn’t get to script it. God did.
Lorenzo: But, but, don’t you think it could have been even more…exciting? You know…don’t you think we’d get even more people in church if there were more… fireworks…if we added, I don’t know, if we added some…things.
Barnabas: Like a banjo?
Fodder: Listen. I think you’ve been reading too much Moby Dick, or even more likely, watching too much scripted-exactly-the-way-we-want-it-to-be-for-commercial-success-therefore-really-really-fakey-reality-t.v! Listen. There the disciples were, Peter and Thomas, and James, and the others, back in their fishing boat, back exactly where they’d started; only it was worse than where they started, because all their hopes, and dreams, and lives had been shattered. Jesus had been killed. The Messiah, their friend. He was dead.
Barnabas: Ah. And what do you think they most wanted, above all else, but couldn’t even have imagined was possible? Did they want…glory…fireworks?
Lorenzo: I’ll bet they wanted a “do over.”
Fodder: But what they got was even better than that. Not a do-over. But a done-forever. They got their lives…God…everything back…and He was calling them by name:
Barnabas: Friends!
Fodder: You want amazing? Then just think about that. You get up in the morning knowing that everything is over, and by breakfast time you’re having a picnic with your best friends, which includes God, on the beach.
Lorenzo: Hmm. Life’s weird that way, isn’t it.
Barnabas: Thanks to God, it is.
Fodder:
All: Now, is this a great day or what?
Encompassing EasterThe Season of Lent .... Encompassing Easter .... John 12:12-19: Jesus’ triumphal entry into Jerusalem .... Easter gives life meaning ..... Palm SundayPuppets: Barnabas, Fodder, and OliviaPeople: KidsProps: Cardboard box, with “Easter” written on one side; palm fronds of some kind inside—paper or otherwise Songs: Lively Easter music, to be played at end, while kids dance
[Barnabas, Fodder, and Olivia are up front, Barnabas with the box in his lap].
Barnabas: Buenos dias, boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Olivia: Hi kids, it’s good to see you all here this morning.
Fodder: Gooood morning Methodists! Whaaat’s happpenin?
Barnabas: Look! I invented a new machine. Now you guys need to help me figure out what it does.
Olivia: You invented something, and you don’t even know what it is?
Barnabas: Well how could I? I haven’t even tried it yet.
Fodder: Olivia, don’t you know that for real men like us, inventing is just like cooking? We just toss things together, and spit a few times [do so], and then we talk one of our friends into trying it out first.
Olivia: Friends?
Barnabas: In case it blows up—or tastes terrible. So Olivia, you wanna try it?
Olivia: No thanks. Go right ahead.
Fodder: I’ll go. Let’s see. This looks like a button. I’ll try pushing it. [Push it]
Barnabas: What happened?
Olivia: Nothing.
Fodder: [Excited] No. That was weird.
Barnabas: What?
Fodder: Right when I pushed the button, I got this image in my mind of a great big barbecued salmon, all laid out for a feast and ready to eat.
Olivia: But that’s what you’ve always got on your mind.
Fodder: Oh.
Barnabas: Here, let me try. [Push] That was weird.
Fodder: What, what?
Barnabas: Right when I pushed it, I blinked. Did you blink? Maybe this is a blink inducer.
Fodder: Here, try it again. [Push] Ok. Did you kids blink?
Olivia: Of course they blinked. Everyone blinks, about every eight seconds, on average. Unless you happen to be in the middle of a Presidential debate. Then you blink a lot more, I’m told.
Barnabas: Say, I have an idea. Maybe this is some kind of oracle computer. Maybe we’re supposed to ask it questions, and it answers them, like your Sunday School teacher, only faster.
Fodder: Cool. Let’s try it. I know. How about this: OK invention, “just what is it that you do?” [Push button, wait]
Barnabas: Maybe that question was too difficult for it. How about this one: “What is the meaning of life?”
Olivia: Hey look, it says something here on this end: it says “Easter.”
Fodder: [Thoughtfully] The meaning of life is “Easter.” Hmm. Let’s try another question. I know, here’s one that I’ve been wondering—about today’s Bible story.
Barnabas: Bible story?
Olivia: You know, those things that we’re supposed to be telling up here—at least on the days that we don’t get too distracted by the odd cardboard box and our own enthusiasms!
Fodder: Today’s Bible story! Today is Palm Sunday, after all. The day that Jesus entered in triumphal fashion into Jerusalem, and the people all gathered, excited, knowing that…that…Jesus was someone special…that he had recently raised Lazarus from the dead. And that he could save them. So they pulled down palm branches and they waved them and they shouted:
All: Hosanna. Save us. Blessed is the one who comes in the name of the Lord. The King of Israel.
Fodder: Exactly! And so my question is this: “how could Jesus be excited and enjoy the Palm Sunday parade; how could he enjoy life, when he knew that…Good Friday was just around the corner. [Push button]
Barnabas: [Looking] It says “Easter,” again.
Olivia: Hmm, kinda repetitive, but…profound.
Barnabas: I know, how about this question: “how can anyone be happy, and live an abundant life, when there is so much pain and sorrow and suffering and misery in the world. Let’s see what the box says about that. [Push button]
Fodder: Hmm. “Easter.”
Olivia: Let me see that. [Grabbing box] Barnabas! This isn’t a computer, or an invention, or anything!! It’s just the box of palms for Palm Sunday that you got from the supply room. See? That’s why it says “Easter” right here. It’s just the Easter supplies!!! [Long pause, Barnabas and Fodder look astonished at Olivia.]
Barnabas: Oops.
Fodder: [Thoughtfully, examining box] You’re right Olivia. I guess your invention isn’t a computer after all, Barnabas.
Olivia: Well I should say not.
Fodder: [With profundity] It’s a compass. [Olivia does a double take] And it’s pointing straight at Easter. So that we don’t lose our way. Even when we are sad, or in pain, and when we’re happy. See? [Looking at box] Easter. That way. [Point to cross]. Cool invention Barnabas. I like it. Can I take it home with me? Everyone needs a compass.
Barnabas: Sure. And in the meantime, let’s grab these palms and celebrate. After all, it is Palm Sunday. [Pass around palms, stand up and dance to music].
All: Now, is this a great day or what?
The Psychology of LoveSeason of Lent .... The Psychology of Love .... Mark 14:66-72: Peter denies Jesus .... God loves us, even when we make mistakes
Puppets: Fodder and OliviaPeople: KidsProps: Scarf for Olivia, as Servant Girl; headpiece for Fodder, as PeterSongs: Jesus Loves Me
[Tell the kids that they are going to be roosters, and that they need to be ready to crow, on cue]
[Fodder and Olivia are up front, with props in prop at their feet]
Fodder: [Imitating Barnabas] Buenos dias boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Olivia: What was that supposed to be?
Fodder: Just because Barnabas isn’t here this morning, doesn’t mean his greeting can’t be.
Olivia: That’s the whole point, the object of it all: being in relation to God.
Puppets: Barnabas, Olivia, and Fodder People: Kids Songs: Lord’s Prayer
[Barnabas, Olivia, and Fodder are all up front, Olivia in the middle]
Barnabas: Buenos dias, boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Olivia: Hi kids. It’s good to see you all here this morning.
Fodder: Gooood mornnnning Methodists! Whaaaaat’s happpenin?
Barnabas: I don’t know what’s happening. But I do know what I’m wondering.
Olivia: What’s that, Barnabas?
Barnabas: I was wondering whether Jesus knew Kung Fu.
Fodder: What?
Barnabas: Well, what I was really wondering was why Jesus didn’t fight back. When they came to get him in the Garden of Gethsemene, you know, with Judas betraying him, and the soldiers coming to arrest him. Why didn’t Jesus fight back? He could have.
Olivia: Hmm.
Fodder: I know what you mean. When the soldiers came to grab Jesus, why didn’t he just do some Jesus jujitsu? [Pause]
Olivia: [Quietly] He did.
Fodder and Barnabas: He did?
Olivia: That’s exactly what he did. Jesus jujitsu—responding not by fighting back, not with violence, but by responding with words. With the Word.
Fodder and Barnabas: Huh?
Olivia: Don’t you get it? There he was, in the garden, in the Kidron valley, Jesus with his disciples, a place that he liked to go, to find peace. And Judas knew it. And Judas took advantage of it. Judas knew that Jesus liked that place. So Judas led the solders there, and the police, the police from the chief priests and Pharisees, and they came there in the night with lanterns and torches and weapons.
Barnabas: It sounds like they expected Jesus to fight back. Pow. Kachine. Zowee.
Olivia: But Jesus, knowing all that was to happen to him, came forward in the dark to them, and he asked them: “Whom are you looking for?”
Fodder: And they answered: “Jesus of Nazareth.”
Olivia: Exactly. And that’s when Jesus did his jujitsu.
Fodder and Barnabas: Huh?
Olivia: Here, maybe it will be easier if I tell you a story first.
Barnabas: OK.
Fodder: I like stories.
Olivia: So, there was Moses, walking in the desert, looking for one of his lost sheep.
Barnabas: Moses? Is this another Bible story?
Olivia: Shh. And then suddenly, Moses saw something…weird…something… strange…something that made his hair stand up on the back of his neck.
Fodder: That happened to me the first time I saw canned salmon.
Olivia: No, really. You know what Moses saw, it was a bush, on fire, but it wasn’t burning up. And it was God there. And God called him by name, saying: “Moses, Moses.”
Barnabas: I know. We’ve studied this in Sunday School. And God called on Moses to be a leader, to go back and lead the Israelites out of slavery in Egypt, saying that he, God would help.
Olivia: But Moses was nervous about all this. So he asked his famous question:
Fodder: What question?
Barnabas: He said to God: “What is your name?”
Olivia: And God didn’t yell, or get mad, or…not answer. God did answer, and He said: “I am who I am. And if anyone asks, or wonders why you are doing these things, then tell them that ‘I am’ has sent you.”
Fodder: O….K!? Olivia: So listen. There is Jesus in the dark. With the disciples, who are scared. They know something big is going to happen. Jesus has been talking about it, at the Last Supper, and before.
Barnabas: Right. So here comes Judas, and the soldiers, and the police, in the dark, with their weapons, and their fear, and their hate.
Fodder: And Jesus steps out into the circle of light, from their torches, and says: “Whom are you looking for?” And in their anger they yell out the answer, “Jesus of Nazareth,” the right answer, if only they’d seen it, the one whom we all are looking for.
Barnabas: [Quietly] “Whom are you looking for?”
Fodder: And they say, “Jesus of Nazareth!”
Olivia: And that’s when Jesus responds, with…the Word. He says: [slowly and emphatically “I am.” [Fodder and Barnabas both fall backwards, as if in a faint, with a clunk]Exactly. That’s exactly what Jesus’ disciples did, when they heard Jesus say that. Because they understood.
Barnabas: [Getting back up] I am! The name of God, the same as from the burning bush. Jesus was telling them that…that he…was…God.
Fodder: It was what he’d been saying all along, for those who would listen: in his stories, in his teaching, in his words: I am…I am the way…I am the resurrection and the light. I am here.
Olivia: And he’s telling it to us. [Praying] Thank you Jesus. Thank you for words so that we can pray to you, and say thank you, for your undying love. Thank you, Lord.
All: Now, is this a great day join in and pray, or not? [Sing Lord’s Prayer
The First Last SupperSeason of Lent .... The First Last Supper .... Matthew 26:26-29: The Last Supper .... Jesus in the bread and wine.
Puppets: Barnabas and LorenzoPeople: 2 kids to hold up blanket; five or six kids to be the disciples posing in Da Vinci’s The Last Supper; KidsProps: White sheet, as a tablecloth for puppet bench; communion cup and bread plate; biblical dress for kids, as disciples in Da Vinci painting; bed sheet or blanket; copy of Da Vinci’s painting: The Last Supper, if available
[Arrange to have five or six kids in disciple dress hiding behind altar, ready to come out. Also arrange to have two kids or adults to hold up the sheet]
[Barnabas and Lorenzo are up front; the tablecloth and communion elements are in the prop bag. The copy of the painting is propped up so everyone can see it. The disciple kids are hiding, and the drape holders are sitting up front, ready to go]
Barnabas: Buenos dias boys and girls. How is everybody today?
Lorenzo: Hola ninos. You all look marvelous this morning,simply marvelous.
Barnabas: So. Lorenzo. Are you excited about today’samazing attempt?
Lorenzo: Attempt?
Barnabas: It’s that time of year again.
Lorenzo: What time?
Barnabas: The time when we present a living reenactment of Da Vinci’s famous painting of The Last Supper, in honor of…The Last Supper.
Lorenzo: But there are only two of us. [Counting] Uno, Dos. We can’t enact a whole painting of Jesus and the twelve disciples, with just the two of us.
Barnabas: We can if we move fast.
Lorenzo: All right. But I've got a bad feeling about this. [Prop assistants hold up blanket in front of puppeteers; then drop it, revealing Barnabas and Lorenzo striking a Da Vinci pose. Now speaking to each other out of the sides of their mouths] Aye carumba. The only amazing thing here is how much this doesn’t look like Da Vinci’s painting of The Last Supper.
Barnabas: You’re right.
Lorenzo: So what do we do now?
Barnabas: We start talking about something else quick, so they’llstop thinking about how embarrassing this looks and start thinking about something else.
Lorenzo: Are they really that easy to distract? [Barnabas nods]OK. [Start humming, filling a long pause. Eventually look over and shrug] I know. Let’s talk about if Jesus’ disciples knew that he was dyslexic.
Barnabas: If they knew that he was what?
Lorenzo: You know. Dyslexic. That condition that lots of people have, when they read, when the letters look like they’re backwards or reversed and stuff. After all, Jesus was always going around reversing words: you know, saying that small things were actually big things. And how the first would be last, and the last, first.
Barnabas: That’s not dyslexia…..It’s wisdom.
Lorenzo: [Give Barnabas a long stare] And Jesus was doing it again in today’s Bible story, switching first and last, on that evening, near the end, that we call the Last Supper.
Barnabas: What?
Lorenzo: You know. The story of the Last Supper. But it wasn’t really the last supper. It was the first supper, the first communion, the first Eucharist, when Jesus ate with his disciples, and he told them to continue to eat bread and drink wine together like that, to remember him. He said last, but it was first. Viola: dyslexia.
Barnabas: [Aside] (That should be voila: dyslexia).
Lorenzo: [Aside] (Sorry, I’m dyslexic.) Anyway: voila dyslexia.
Barnabas: But, but, but…it wasn’t just the first supper; it was also the last supper, the last time Jesus ate with his disciples before he was taken by the Romans, and crucified. The Last Supper. In other words, Jesus was not dyslexic.
Lorenzo: Hmm. The first supper and the last supper. I wonder if you can be both dyslexic and not dyslexic—at the same time? Maybe that’s what Jesus was. What’s the word for that?
Barnabas: God.
Lorenzo: [Pause] Oh. [Pause] God. As in omni-lexic. All words. As in “In the beginning was the Word.” I get it. Jesus. As in Jesus in the bread and the wine and the words: “take, eat, this is my body, broken for you. This is my blood, shed for you.” The word made flesh.
Barnabas: Which gives me a better idea for our Last Supper reenactment. We just needed more flesh. [Prop assistants hold up blanket. Quickly spread white sheet, as tablecloth on puppet bench, then put communion elements in middle; hiding kids come out from behind altar in costume, kneeling behind the bench and strike a pose. Assistants drop blanket. Lorenzo and Barnabas move around over to the side, looking on.]
Lorenzo: I don’t know if it looks exactly like the painting or not, but at least this time Jesus is there. In the bread and wine. Right in the middle. With his disciples. The kids. Right where he belongs.
Barnabas: [Praying] Amen! Come Lord Jesus, we’re you’re guests. Let these gifts to us be blest. Thank you Lord for Communion, for the first, and last, and lasting supper. Amen.
All: [Including the posing kids and puppets] Now, is this a great day, or what?
posted by Marvin at 2:50 PM
0 comments
